Well, it happened, March 1st rolled around this year and lo and behold I TURNED 50!!
In this age of seeking for eternal youth, exagerating the importance of the outward appearnace and "looking" younger on the outside, God has revealed a startling thing to my heart. It's a lie AND it's not possible. And there's something more ruminating in the recesses of my mind;
I don't want to be a youngin' forever.
There are so many pitfalls of youth that I'd just as soon not have to deal with or repeat. But don't think for a minute that I don't have those moments from time to time where I see a picture of myself or my reflection in a mirror and don't contemplate the effects of the aging process, they are undeniable! And I'm sure as I get further along, they will be even more obvious with more wrinkles, more gray hair, I'll probably lose my hearing (it's a family trait), my height will diminish and my weight will increase...just kind of goes with the territory.
I truly believe that age has little to do with who we are on the inside, except for the fact that we are growing wiser, hopefully, every year as God moves in our hearts, teaching and instructing. I was priviledged to meet a beautiful, mature woman of 88 this weekend, the mother of a dear friend, who is just the cutest thing. I didn't immediately think "Wow, she's old" but maybe that's because she's supposed to look older on the outside, we all are as time takes it's toll. That's how God intended things to be, how he intended for an octogenarian to look.
I think what I'm attempting to communicate is that I've learned much over the past 50 years and I don't want to take that for granted, devalue the process of "aging". I'm NOT the same on the inside and I'm not going to look the same on the outside. I'm changing and growing and I'm not the same person I was when I was 25 or 30 or 35. I'm older and hopefully a little wiser. I've had experiences that have molded me into the person I am at 50. And as this life here on earth progresses, and the outward self looks older, I hope the inward self grows "older" as well.
Paul, in the letter he wrote to the church in Philippi tells them "And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." Of course, this is written to a group of believers but we can apply it to our lives as well. God will finish what he started when we were born. God is the giver of life!! He formed me in my mother's womb, he gave me certain DNA and personality traits and is at work still as my body ages and as my mind and soul grow and learn and change.
It's a wonderful thing, this aging process. Instead of grumbling and complaining about it, let's embrace it!! Let's recognize the truth in this process. God has a plan and He is bringing it to completion, whatever that means for the outside me AND the inside me!!